Saw at interesting question over at Arete's blog: how does one get into a romantic relationship? I have an answer for that: Unwillingly! Ha! Just kidding. If you're looking, and you have someone in your sights, then the odds are that it won't happen with that person. All those sappy Freddie Prinze, Jr. movies have it right; the one you're fixated on isn't all that, and it's the person that you're overlooking but is right in front of your nose (or just out of sight, waiting to be discovered by you) that will be the one. It's basically a three-step process: first, get fixated on 'mr./ms. right' and wonder why sparks haven't flown yet. Come out to them how much you care for them and get shot down, leading to stage two, which is weeks or months of grief/sadness about 'how could I have been such a fool', 'i'll never find love', etc., leading to stage three, definitely not 'looking', vulnerable, resigned to a life of a monk/nun, and BAM!, the real 'mr/ms. right' walks into your life. It's not unheard of that in stage one, coming out to someone could lead them to say 'oh, yeah? i feel the same way about you!', but's it's highly unlikely. If it hasn't happened yet with them, it probably won't ever.
